God's Plan

Find the right guy, get married, and have kids.....It's suppose to be easy. Right? Even before we were married, we talked of having kids. After all, both of us are by nature "planners." For certain, we would have two...maybe three if we could afford it. Our only point of discussion was when would we start a family and how far would we space them out. Rick only wanted a couple of years between kids and I wanted 3...maybe even 4 as I really wanted to enjoy having just one child. Thinking about this thought almost makes me laugh, knowing now how it would all turn out.

We were married in October of 2000. I was only 25 at the time and I could have waited, but at almost 30, Rick was anxious to be a Dad. I always had a intuitive feeling that getting pregnant would not be easy for me. So, I agreed to begin trying after being married about six months. After trying for six months, Rick's patience was already worn a bit thin and being who I am, I began to really worry. Of course everyone told us to be patient, including doctors. At a year, my doctor completed a few test but didn't find anything wrong and placed me on Clomid, a common fertility drug given to women. But, that wasn't the answer. At that point, Rick had been speaking with a co-worker who was pregnant and had seen a fertility specialist. She urged us to speak with him, so we first saw Dr. Sims in July of 2002 and he ordered a complete work up of test on each of us, even repeating some test my other doctor had completed. This meant numerous trips to the doctors office for tests, ultra sounds, blood test, more test etc. During one procedure, where they shot dye into my tubes to make sure they were open, the doctor discovered that I had a septated uterus, which meant if I were to become pregnant then most likely I would miscarry or not carry to term. Dr. Sims scheduled me for surgery in late August. The repair to my uterus was a success but during surgery, it was discovered that I had severe endometriosis. He was able to remove some of it but not all. He suggested I take a drug called Lupron for at least six months which would basically throw my body into a menopausal state. He felt this might give me the best odds at reducing the endometriosis, as this was the only thing that he had discovered which could be causing infertility. After completing some research and much prayer, we decided to go against his recommendation. After we gave Dr. Sims our answer, he began a different approach without any hesitation.

In November, I took my first round of fertility shots. I was accustomed to getting shots from a pro/nurse but from my husband, a novice on a daily basis was not exactly fun. However, I was grateful because I was definitely too much of a wimp to give them to myself. Our first round failed and I developed cysts on my ovaries which meant I would have to go back on the pill for the month of December. Each round of fertility treatment cost us around a thousand dollars. I remember that Christmas very well as with every holiday during this time. Every child made me think about whether we would ever experience the joys of children. It was definitely a very sad Christmas for me. In January, we went for round two of fertility drugs and the doctor told us that if it didn't work, our next step would be Invitro which would be even more costly. The doctor upped my fertility dosage. To be honest, I didn't think twice about this. My desire to have a child was so overwhelming I just never really thought about the possibility of multiples especially since we couldn't even have one. Knowing ovulation didn't seem to be my problem, I kept inquiring about IUI. The doctor said it was only an extra $350 and that really seemed like pocket change considering all of the other costs we had encountered. Without hesitation, I said, "let's do it." This would allow them to get the timing and everything else perfect. And so our infertility road would end here (almost 6 years ago today) and God would have many surprises ahead for us.

While all of this seems so clinical, I know without doubt God gave us our miracle and infertility was all a part of a greater plan. During our struggle to conceive, we both grew closer to God and joined the BA Church of Christ. However, during this time I must admit my faith was severely tested. I couldn't help but think, "Why us?" I also couldn't help but think that Rick would be better off with a wife that could give him children. Each month seemed like an eternity and I was always searching for answers. Fortunately, I continued to pray. Although many of our close friends and family knew of our struggles to conceive we really didn't share with our church family until January of 2003. We had our entire Sunday School class praying for us. So many of our church friends offered us so much encouragement and support during this time. And, what do you know...we conceived that very month. Coincidence...I don't think so. God's Plan.